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Monday Rush

The Marcus School

Eyes from Tolu
Lips from Jennifer
Face… hmm… definitely Sarah
Hips from Oge
The Booty has to be Shola
Leg’s from Ngozi
Jugs from Aisha (But the nipples can come from Lizzy)
Feet…nails and even fingers from Yetunde
Hair. Hmmm… I think Jennifer too
Yeah, I think that about does it. She’ll work just fine….hmm….wait, wait, what about:
Kissing abilities?
Bed skills?
Cooking skills?
Attitude issues?

Sit most guys down and ask them who their perfect/near-perfect gurl would be and they’d probably say stuff like what you have up there. Well, some might run through names of gurls they’ve been involved with in the past while others will form this near-perfect voltron using lions made from celebs such as Nicki, Halle…. you get the point.

As a kid, I’d say I grew up really fast. By the time I was ten I knew a lot of stuff many sixteen year olds didn’t know (thanks or no thanks to my older cousins who I grew up with). One of the movies I saw many many times before I turned ten was Eddie Murphy’s Boomerang. Now, for those who haven’t seen Boomerang, I’ve included a trailer, well, it was the only one I could find online but trust me, it didn’t do the movie justice. If you’ve seen or heard about it, let your mind travel back to the early 90’s and imagine a young boy watching the movie over and over again.


I loved Marcus, Eddie Murphy’s character. No, I idolized him. I wanted to be able to run through gurls the way he did all in the process of finding my “ Miss near perfect” and for most of my early dealings with members of the opposite sex, I took cues from him. I had the picture of this perfect gurl I wanted and once she didn’t fit – perfectly, it was on to the next one. Some of you are probably wondering, what’s he talking about, isn’t that what we all do? Well, sometimes, when you engage a friend in a conversation about a near miss (a err… “thing” that almost led to a relationship), they’ll probably give reasons like, well, she’s an AS and I’m also one, or maybe my mom doesn’t like her or something almost reasonable.

There were times, I asked myself that question and all I came up with was, her toes look funny, she’s gap-toothed, her laugh sounds funny, we took a picture together and I didn’t like it or wait for this….. her name doesn’t sound good with my surname. Crazy? Well, it took me a long time to realize just how crazy some of these excuses were… why? Cause around some guys (depending on the type of friends you keep) it would sound absolutely normal.

In Boomerang, Eddie Murphy ended up with Halle Berry but in real life, that never happens. Most times when you see a reasonably good looking guy married to a chic who’s far from “good looking” (yes, we are all beautiful in our own ways but we can’t all be beauty queens), he’s most likely to be a member of “The Marcus School”.

Now, don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying you shouldn’t have preferences and certain ideals you look out for in members of the opposite sex (yes, this doesn’t only apply to guys), but the truth is, the possibility of you finding that guy or gurl who fits perfectly the description of your ideal partner is almost negligible; especially in the world we live in today.

Am I asking you to compromise? Well, somewhat. The question is what to compromise on. Don’t train your mind to believe you can’t get involved with people from one part of the country. Neither will hooking up with someone who isn’t light skinned kill you. Think of the 80:20 approach, for some, 60:40….. if  60% of what you want is present and the remaining 40 is made up of stuff you can live with then that might just be good enough.

Some might disagree with me on this one but I guess that’s why we are here.. have your say in the comment box below. Have a great week guys….


About thetoolsman

I mostly refer to myself as an unrepentant media addict .. Well, cause I'm mostly always hunting for information through one media channel or the other... Hit me up on twitter @thetoolsman


5 thoughts on “The Marcus School

  1. Like you said, ” if 60% of what you want is present and the remaining 40 is made up of stuff you can live with then that might just be good enough” i think i’m fine with this rule cause no body is perfect after all..emmm…hopefully ,she comes with Jugs from Emma and nipples from Tolu then i’m good to go! 😀

    Posted by jayeola | November 8, 2010, 8:43 am
  2. Right now…I’m doing 40:60…that is 40% of what I want in a guy is there and the remaining 60% is what I don’t want that is present.lol. Ok..iKid..he’s not bad…but yea..we all have to learn to compromise. Nice one tools 🙂

    Posted by oyzayna | November 8, 2010, 9:33 am
  3. Finally commenting on this. 🙂
    80:20 is a bit too much though.
    I think everyone should go with 60:40.
    And I think the whole point of being with someone (like, say genuine love or something) is to be able to put up with that 40%.
    But then again, we can’t speak for everbody abi?
    Preferences and all.

    I love your writing either way.

    Posted by Y | November 8, 2010, 7:28 pm
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  1. Pingback: It’s not you, it’s the nose. « Thetoolsman's Blog - January 24, 2011

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