Hey people, today the world celebrates workers and justice served? History. Well after the monologues I decided to let you guys in on some stuff I’ve been working on for you. So here’s the trailer for another 13 week long series that’ll debut here soon enough. Please share your thoughts using the comment box and enjoy the rest of the holiday. Cheers.
“Will you just find me an educated midget.”
“I can’t do a show on vertically challenged people without talking to a midget can I?”
“Arrrghhhh stop ringing gaddemit?
“Let me call you back.”
I did it! I did it Kemi.
Oh, Charles I’m sorta in the middle of something… can I…
I just did it Kemi…
What did you do?
I bought a ring…….. I just went and bou—
You did what?
I bought a ring!
What kind of ring? For what? For who?
Well, that’s what you’re going to help me figure out.
I looked up to see Charles’ pearly white teeth grinning at me as he held open the door to my office with one arm while he clutched on to an opened jewelry box with his other hand. Oh, manners. Hi. My name is Adekemi Manuel. Host of “The Late Late Night Show With Kemi”, daughter to His Royal Highness, the Ooni of Ife and wife to Captain Babatunde Manuel. We’ll get to that later. Standing at the door to my office is Charles.
“Well, don’t just sit there. Are you just going to …. What are you doing? Who are you calling?”
Hey, Kemi, can I call you right back, I’m kinda in a tight position right now”
Well, let me make it tighter for you – Charles bought a ring?
Yes, you heard me right, he bought a WEDDING ring.
For what? I mean for who? ……. Whaooooooo … ouch..
Err… Jade, are you ok?
Ooooouuuch… Yes, I’m fine, I only almost just fell off an elephant.
Charles: Elephant? Where on earth are you this time?
Jade: Oh, so you’re there……. I’m in India; traveling with a UN team and I hope that ring is for Sandra.
Jadesola Adeyemi. The most selfless person I know, possibly the most selfless person in the whole world. She’s always in one place or the other somewhere in the world helping people and almost always forgetting about herself. More about her later..
Kemi: You mean Tara…
Jade: Oh, there are just too many of them.. but, yes, her…
Charles: Oh, hell no.. she has manly feet and that spooky sound she makes when she sleeps….not happening …
Kemi: Just stop. Stop it Charles. Why did you buy a ring if you have no one to give it to. Is this all a joke?
Charles: Well…. I’ll turn 30 in about ten weeks from today …. I visited my mom yesterday and she just…. she said somethings and I thought, what the heck, it’s time.. I’m matured enough… I’m ready…. so I went out and bought a ring.
Jade: Kemi, please slap him for me.
Jade: So that’s just why you bought a ring?
Kemi: wait, so, now what do you want from us.
Charles: Seeing as you guys are my bestest friends in the world and probably know more about me than anyone else, I’ve decided that you’ll help me make the decision.
Jade: huh? Is he being serious?
Charles: I know how hard a task it can be, considering my erm… past … and present… but here
(Charles brings out a folded sheet of paper from his pocket).
I call it, my “deed map”… On it, I have 19 names of girls I’ve been with at some point in my life and a little background information – most of which I’m sure you already know, if you can remember that is – well, I was aiming for ten but I just couldn’t… – so, 19 gurls and I need to eliminate 18 of them before my birthday so I can propose.
Oh, one more thing, this isn’t the bachelor – this is my life so, better take it seriously.
Kemi: You can’t be ….serious..
(Kemi said with her mouth wide open as she further examined the “deed map”)
Jade: I’ll be back next tomorrow.
Charles: That’s the spirit.. Oh, I’m late for a lunch date. I’ll talk to you girls later. Ciao
Charles Effiong. Youngest Ad Agency Creative Director in the country. Successful smooth talking mutherfucker; mini sex God, ladies man and best friend to Jade and I for almost 10 years. This might sound like a joke but I know when Charles is serious and this is one of those times. God help us.